I AM the Witness
Take a Sabbatical at the Royal Teton Ranch
Dear Mother and Pearls Readers,
I am filled with joy as I witness the sun shining down upon the Yellowstone River on this early autumn day. Reflected in the waters of the river are the golden leaves of trees growing along the bank.
At moments like these, I feel extremely fortunate to be here at the Royal Teton Ranch and not pounding the pavement in Los Angeles, New York or a hundred other cities. Here I do not have to be concerned about being mugged, being stranded in traffic, being barraged by rock and rap music or being subjected to the other myriad stresses of the mass consciousness. I just wonder what took me so long to get here. Conceivably, I could have been here eight years earlier than I was.
One reason I delayed coming and joining the staff and the Community was fear–fear of the cold. After spending six winters here, I can truly say that the weather in this sheltered Paradise Valley has not been nearly as bad as I feared. I was often more uncomfortably cold in the damp cold of central California than I’ve been in the dry cold here. My blood has thickened, so to speak, and I have learned to dress so that I am usually not uncomfortable during cold spells.
Another fear I had was of hard work. Sometimes the only way to overcome fears is to make the calls to the Masters and then to confront the fears. So I talked myself into volunteering to serve at the ranch for a summer. I figured that I could at least get through one summer.
I had such a great time that I came back for two more summers before finally joining staff. The third summer of volunteer work and my first summer on staff were spent irrigating crops. The second summer of irrigating was particularly intense because we probably had more acres planted than ever before. We were trying to finish stocking our shelters with food.
When that summer was drawing to a close (and after many, many initiations), one of the seasonal farm staff confided in me that he had not really thought that I would last through the summer but that I had surprised him. So if I, a “98-pound weakling,” can do it–by God’s grace–so can most of you out there who may be hesitating.
Another reason I did not arrive at the Inner Retreat sooner was attachment. I had a good job and many possessions that I was unwilling to release. A rather amusing dream showed me that I had better surrender those attachments; otherwise I was going to miss the boat or, in this case, the bus.
At that period of my life, I was commuting to work on the bus. I dreamed that one day after work I arrived at the bus stop with a pig on a leash. I immediately realized that I had a dilemma. I knew that the bus driver would not allow me on the bus with a pig. I had to either leave the pig (greed) or miss the bus. I tied the pig to a bicycle rack and stepped onto the bus.
I was recently reading the Tao Teh Ching by Lao Tzu <*>and discovered quotes that are appropriate to nonattachment:
| Keep empty and you will be filled. (22.3-6) He who knows when he has got enough (33.5) Thus, an excessive love for anything will (44.4-6) |
Now that I am finally here, I find life on staff and in the Community to be easier than life on the outside. Here, I can walk from where I live to work, decrees, services and the cafeteria. Before, I felt I was putting my life at risk by getting on the freeway to get to work and services. Life was a constant struggle, i.e., juggling all the balls representing the various compartments of my life without dropping any of them.
I enjoy the Community so much that I am reluctant to leave even for vacations. I spent my first vacation on staff here because I really could not figure out what was out there that I wanted which I did not have here. I was telling a visiting relative how infrequently I left the ranch. He replied, “You have everything you need here.” The best part of leaving the Community is coming back. You appreciate the Community after going outside of it and experiencing the negativity elsewhere.
Again, quoting the Tao Teh Ching:
| He who stays where he has found his (33.7) Without going out of your door, (47.1-7) |
When I first came on staff, I took the Community for granted. However, about two and a half years ago I became very ill. The tremendous support of the Community was largely responsible for my complete recovery. I now know why the Sangha (the Community) is one of the Three Jewels in which the disciple takes refuge–i.e., turns to for protection and aid–along with the Buddha and the Dharma (the Teaching, or the Great Law). The Community is truly a precious jewel to be cherished, protected and not to be taken for granted.
I would encourage anyone who is considering applying for staff not to procrastinate, as I did, and thus delay the joy.
Lanello sums it up succinctly in his closing dictation from the FREEDOM 1993 conference (Pearls of Wisdom, vol. 37, no. 27):
And this day I appeal to you who are the members at large to come for a stay, to take up your place in one of the departments of the Church....
Yes, beloved, there needs to be a changing of the guard that those tending the fields that are white already to the harvest might come and serve at headquarters for a season and learn what chelaship is and not believe those stories about how hard, hard, hard and much too hard it is to serve on the Messenger’s staff....
...Take a stint, take a sabbatical here, and come and see how you also can emerge as the shining ones.
In the joy of the Jewels,
I AM
* Translated by John C. H. Wu (Boston: Shambhala Publications, 1990)
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