The Quest for the Meaning of Life

How I Found The Teachings

By William White

I recall a warm summer night as an eight-year old boy, lying on my bed looking out at the beautiful star filled sky, and wondering: Where did I come from? Who Am I? Why am I here?

Having been introduced to formalized religion in a Baptist Church at an early age, I grew up accepting the presence of God in my life. In Sunday School I learned about the life of Jesus and the great sacrifice that he had made for the world. There was, however, a gnawing feeling within that something was missing, that there was much more to know about my existence. These kinds of questions retreated somewhat as I experienced the throes of adolescence and grew into early adulthood. The quest for meaning nevertheless, was always present, sometimes conscious, sometimes unconscious.

Fast-forward to the year 1977. I was commuting from my home to work in Washington, D.C. on a chartered bus (about a 45 minute ride), and my seat-mate and I used that time to discuss a full range of topics each morning, including current events, politics, economics, science and, most often, religion. I remember having told her that I had read Edgar Cayce’s There is a River many years previous, and later Paramahansa’s Autobiography of a Yogi, and how they had impacted my life. Later, I had attended the Church of Religious Science while living in Los Angeles, as I continued my quest.

One morning, as our bus threaded through Washington’s notorious traffic, my seatmate said to me that she had been called the night before by a friend who told her to “throw away all your books, I have found the answers to life.” Her friend was referring to the Teachings of The Ascended Masters. Needless to say, I wanted to find out all that I could about these “answers to life.” I learned that there were Sunday services being held in Washington at a hotel (Rakoczy Mansion, the Teaching Center, was undergoing rehabilitation at that time). After encountering several detours, I arrived at the hotel in the midst of the service. Dynamic decrees to Archangel Michael were being led by Brewster Freeland, and I was led to a seat next to Dr. Ranville and Lilleth Clark, who shared a decree book with me, and I began to decree. It seemed very natural to me, and gave me a very warm feeling. I was close, I thought, to that which I had been seeking.

About a month later, I was in Los Angeles on business, and took time to drive up to the Pasadena campus where I was warmly received by Jean Allison who took an inordinate amount of time to explain many aspects of the Teachings to me. She strongly suggested that I return in a few months for the July Conference. Fortunately for me, I did have business in San Francisco a few days in advance of the Conference, and was able to attend beginning the second day of Only Love. I became a Keeper of the Flame on the 4th of July at that Conference.

While there are many paths leading back to the Great Central Sun, this one which I have chosen, is for me perhaps the most challenging and arduous, yet most joyous and fulfilling. I cannot adequately express the gratitude that I feel, having had the opportunity to “sit at the feet of the Guru.”

Looking back, it now seems appropriate to me that my first Conference was entitled Only Love. Love is the building block of our universe, the sine qua non of all life. It is central to my life, deeply imbedded within my heart.

Those profound questions asked by that eight-year old boy on a sultry summer night, were finally answered for that forty-six year old man decades later.

I am grateful to have come home.